Reflections

It has been almost three months since I have been back from my month in Jamaica, and it's been on my mind every day since then. I think about it when I am giving presentations about the experience, when I am using my experiences to better relate to and teach my kiddos, and in everyday life -- I even have dreams about it. It was one of the best experiences I have ever had, and I am so glad that I chose to put myself out there.

I have always been a big family person, and before I started college, I was more of a homebody than I realized. I liked to stay in Janesville and be around my family, and I hadn't traveled much besides going to Disney World and to Mexico once for Spring Break with my family. So when I decided to go to University of Wisconsin - La Crosse after graduation, it was more of a leap than I had originally thought.

I had wanted to be a teacher since I was 4 years old, but decided during my junior year that maybe I would like to be a pediatrician -- that way I could work in science and with kids, but it would be a little (okay, a lot) more money. I had heard good things about the pre-med program at UW-La Crosse, so I applied there and got in. I was excited for new experiences and being a little ways away from home, but "not too far".

Boy, was I wrong. The first few days after moving into my dorm room, I was having a terrible time. I couldn't eat, I didn't sleep, and I was constantly calling my boyfriend, friends, and parents. Needless to say, I didn't make it very long. I left after the third day so that I could transfer to UW-Whitewater which was closer to home, closer to where my friends were, and to regain my sanity. For a few weeks I felt like maybe I had made a terrible decision in leaving and that I had no idea what I was doing with my life -- I was depressed. In the end, it all turned out okay because I ended up going back to my original decision of being a teacher, and one thing Whitewater is known for is its education program. I also met lots of awesome people, and became very close with some people that were already in my life. There was just a bit of a rough patch getting to where I wanted and needed to be, but that's true of anything in life.

The reason I am telling you all this is not to make you feel bad for me, but to help you understand why going to Jamaica for a month to student teach was such a big deal for me. I had obviously matured since my first few days of freshman year, but I still wasn't sure if being away from family, friends, and home for that month was something I could do.

But I did. I was in Jamaica for 28 days, and not once did I have a sleepless night or call someone crying about missing home. Not only did I make it away from home for a month, I lived in a very rural part of a developing country for that month and taught mostly poor students in a school that had very little resources compared to what I was used to. That isn't to say there weren't times that I was frustrated, or missed home -- my family and the schools -- but I powered through those moments and came out with so much more confidence, experience, and awareness.

Since I have been back, I was offered a long-term substitute position right off the bat at the school where I had done the bulk of my student teaching, and I am now doing day-to-day sub jobs in all sorts of areas -- including music and physical education. (Teaching P.E. in Jamaica definitely helped with that last one!)

In Jamaica, I had stepped into a classroom in a different country, with some difficulty with communication and with no teacher expectations for the students, and I had effectively put classroom management and positive reward systems into place. The students wanted to learn from me, and they were anxious to be read to and explore new things. It was amazing to see what I could accomplish in just 3 weeks with those students, and it helped me to feel confident in my abilities to make a difference and to be in control of a classroom in the United States. I still sometimes have a hard time believing that I am a "real teacher" now, but I am so happy to be doing the job that I always dreamed of!